The Wonderful, Wacky World of The Stuffed Wombat Award

When I was a student in the Cinema Department of the University of Southern California, I endured the screenings of many student projects. We were merciless and cruel and we tore each other's work apart. It was a dreadful learning experience, quickly forgotten. Except for one, golden moment.

Of all the films, a single project still haunts my mind. It contained a defining moment so acute, so singular, that even now, decades later, it is as clear as if I am experiencing it for the first time.

It was the usual nonsequitor dialogue scene, a staple in the student films of the time: A shapely woman and a "Sydney Greenstreet" character, white suit and panama hat. In the foreground, a stuffed wombat. As the scene begins, the Greenstreet character reaches out to "pet" the wombat, and slowly, it dawns on the audience that the perspective of the shot makes it appear that he is stroking the woman's breasts. A clearly unforgettable moment.

Therefore, The Stuffed Wombat award goes to the site that contains an unforgettable defining moment.

There are two varieties of wombats: Free Range and Common.

Here's how to acquire the wombat:

Send me an e-mail with your "url." I will check out your site and determine the class of your award. You will be notified by e-mail when it is ready. Your check for $5.00 will cover my expenses in creating your unique wombat. Instructions will be included. When the check is received, the wombat is yours!

Should there be any proceeds left over, they will be used to support our effort to salvage and recycle pocket protectors. (As you know, the Wombat is a marsupial. She carries her babies in a pouch.) If you wish to donate your old pocket protectors, e-mail for instructions. Please check for ink and mechanical pencil lead.

As of now (November, 1998) there is no $5.00 fee. Your Wombat will be absolutely free! (there are already too many internet sites charging unnecessary fees.)